It is a good thing that I didn't take up running this month because I don't think I would have stuck with it. I am getting out for runs (albeit very few of them) because I think I should rather because I really want to. I am afraid of losing my running completely, so I am running. Running has been my escape and my "me" time. But not lately. Where did my love of running go?? Where is that runner's high??
I went out for a run on Monday*. I was going to get up early, but slept in**. I didn't get down to the the bay/beach until 9 a.m. Thankfully, our weather has cooled off considerably. It would have been even nicer a couple of hours earlier. I was hoping to have a great run. Maybe my expectations were too high. It wasn't as though it was a bad run. In fact, my pace was pretty good--9:06 average. I ran the fourth mile in 8:06 and the two miles after that under 9 minutes. The rest were closer to 9:30. Those splits should make me happy. I was hoping to have an effortless run. Do those even exist?
I think that since I am only getting one real quality run a week, I am trying to put too much into it. I think I would have had more fun if I would have just run a nice easy pace. Why do I insist on going so much faster than my training pace and throwing in tempo miles and feeling spent? Next week I really need to slow down and enjoy myself.
There are a few things going on that are affecting my runs. Actually, my lack of runs might be affecting those things. It is like the chicken and the egg. I haven't been eating well. The more I run, the better I eat. But the crappier I eat, the less I want to run. See the cycle? It doesn't help that I am not making "grown up" food for dinner. Most of the time, I make something for the kids that I know they'll eat and I just snack. Also, I am getting back into a dangerous soda habit. When I am running four or five days a week, I don't drink (much) soda. These days, I'm drinking way too much. So am I having crappy runs because I am eating/drinking crap? Or am I eating/drinking crap because of a lack of quality runs?
Unfortunately, right now I can't increase the amount of time spent running due to the fact that my husband is working two hours away. One quality run a week is all I can really count on. I can usually squeeze in a second run during the week. That should be tomorrow, but I have a garage sale to get ready for and a potential renter coming to look at my house. I need my precious hours without the kids to get stuff done.
I want to get some fun back into my running. So until I move north and establish a new routine, I am going to slow down and enjoy San Diego. Several of my friends have asked about group runs. I stopped doing them after we stopped training for the half marathon. I really enjoyed them as I know the other women did. I am going to try to set something up for this weekend. It will accomplish a couple of goals: spend quality time with my friends, make sure I get up and out early (before it gets hot) and slow down and relax while running.
Once we move*** I will start training for a race. I have a November half marathon where I am pacing a friend and the Ragnar relay in February. I am also seriously considering P.F. Chang's Rock-N-Roll Arizona in January, Carlsbad Half Marathon in January and Surf City Half Marathon in February. Training for a race gives me focus. Maybe some focus is what I need right now.
*I didn't go for my normal Sunday run because it was my son's 6th birthday and I love being there when he wakes up. It is so exciting to wake up and be a year older!
**The birthday celebration the evening before took it out of me.
***I wish I knew when that will be. We are trying to rent out our house and minimize paying double. Living in limbo is tough.